The Time Traveler's Wife

Or:
The Time Traveler's Trollop: A Review for a Picture I Have Not Seen.

As it happens, I am oft confronted with a dilemma when two pictures are releas'd on the same week-end. Which to see? On this occasion I took it upon myself to see the picture concerning space men. (Review forthcoming, fair reader)

To which you might proclaim, "Surely Corny, you can not review a picture you did not witness first hand!"

Poppycock. (And that is Mr. Von Copperpot to you).

Being a learned man of letters, I am perfectly capable of telling you my thoughts on this picture, much more so than yourself.

You see, this picture is based on a novel, which I have come across in my studies.

Now to my review:
The Time Traveler's Wife, based on the novel "The Time Machine" by H.G. Wells.
The Time Machine is about a dapper young fly-boy who, with the use of a newfangled contraption, travels far into our future and encounters what has become of humanity.
With this picture, the director of course took several liberties. The most obvious being that it is centered on the man's wife, who is afforded the opportunity to look after the home while her husband is away.
During the picture, her husband leaves her, full with child, and whirls away into the future. In this version of the story, however, he can return to the present time and does so with relish, recounting to her all the wondrous things to behold such as horseless carriages, helpful tin-men, and automatic gramophones no larger than a bindle-stick.
She is woebegone on all occasions that he departs, and prepares a feast for his rare returns.
A clever metaphor is used in that an important lesson is learn'd by the wife. Being that betwixt adventures, gentlemen need a warm home to return to and a hot meal to eat. This is the greatest gift of all.
I recommend highly that all young women of standing see this picture, as it is very educational.